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Help! My Child Does Not Want To Go To School

Does your child always complain of a stomachache or a headache right before going to school? Do they always use the same excuse and do you realise there is a pattern of them not going to school? Once you let your child stay home, do they act normal and no longer stomachache or a headache? If they throw tantrum when you try to make your child go to school, then there must be something going one. It is important for you to know the reason of their attitude and find the best solution to curb it. Below are some tips and guides for parents if your kid start to

Don’t panic

If your child decides for not going to school, don’t get panic and straightaway mad and shout at your child. Don’t jump to conclusion and give such critical judgement without knowing the reason yet. Try to remain calm and find positive and helpful solutions. It is being said that all negative behavioural choices are based on some sort of fear. So make it as your mission as a parent to find out what it is that your child is afraid of and then think about what is the best way for them to channel those fears.

Don’t normalise them staying at home

Don’t make it as a habit of allowing your child to stay at home whenever they refuse to go to school. They will find it as a fun alternative and will continue to repeat it. Be firm in not allowing activities such as watching TV or playing computer games when your child stays at home on a school day. Train them to still do homework or study even though they missed the school day. They need to be taught to face their fear and cannot forever avoid it. If they refuse to go to school due to homework or boring subject, they still need to do so when they stay at home.

Communicate with your child and teachers

Keep the lines of communication between yourself and your children together with your children’s teachers wide open. Honest and non-judgemental communication can keep the problem away. Get involved with your kid’s learning and constantly ask the teacher about their attitude and learning progress. Your kid will feel excited to go to school if you and the teachers play part in ensuring your kid to feel comfortable at school.

You have to be supportive but firm at the same time to ensure that your child attends school. If your kid can share problems and the reason why he or she is avoiding school without fear, then you are doing a great thing. If it has something to do with abuse from peers or teachers, then you really need to take the matter up with the appropriate authorities. Don’t let your kid be a victim of abuse.

Play detective

Observe the patterns of when your kid refuses to go to school. Does it always happen every same day? Does he or she fake an illness on certain days? Be objective and play detective. Make sure you do this in a low key, non-accusatory way and don’t put your child on the defensive side as there is no point in doing so. Trace any clues as to what caused your child to avoid school.

Get support

Consider having someone else take your child to school to understand the real situation until everything is resolved. It can be helpful to remove yourself from the job of having to force your child to go to school because your emotions might change during a time like this and it might affect your rational judgement. If your kid refuses to go to school because she or he doesn’t want to separate with you, then have the father take the child to school then. You can let your close friend or other family member be in charge during the transition times until the child get used to going to school.

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